The Tale of the Trail Chicago #1507 Labor Day Hash @ The Party Central Skydeck
Hares: Its Too Soft
Venue: The Skydeck @ Party Central
VIRGINS: Just Scott, Just Ed, Just Mark, Just Kristen
HASHERS: Just Amanda, Bloody Thighs, Just Chris, At Your Cervix, Just Chris II, Just Allen, Just Molly, Just Jenn, Cums in MyAssfault, Flying Hooters, Just Tom, Just Patrick, Special Ed Giver, Sirs Poops A lot, Just Julie, Just John, Just Luis, Just Dave, Just Jenn, Moldy Man Sac, Magnetic Muff, Mudsucker, Lifa, Sex Luthor, Just Stephane. Just Lauren, Packher Arse,
Virgins= 4
Total Hashers= 33
Those of us that couldn’t get out of town for the Holiday weekend had a great day to hash and long trail to run. ITS TOO SOFT laid a long trail that went north to Wrigley field before it turned west to the corner of Western and Irving Park. We started off with four new virgins joining our band of hashers on their trek for beer. The hash went north under the el tracks and popped out near Illinois Masonic Hospital with a major check, but the marks were closely clustered together and the pack got confused until JUST MOLLY found marks with JUST JOHN going north. The pack was now being lead by JUST CHRIS squared. They also had AT YOUR CERVIX in tow finding trail going towards the Belmont and Clark corner. Here the trail went thru an alley that I found with the help of JUST ALLEN. The trail seemed to die here but went back east thru Boys Town.
The pack went north to the Addison Police station and continued around Wrigley Field. JUST KRISTEN a new virgin was in the lead group with MOLDY MAN SAC and FLYING HOOTERS. The pack kept going east and could have used a wagon to cart some of the walking wounded west much like our pioneers of old, but most made it to the corner of Western and Irving Park. Here we found our BN but soon found the trail gone, wiped out by some dude washing his car and watering his grass.
I guess **** happens as they do on all trails with this being no exception. The FRB’s enjoyed water and LIFA joined JUST JENN, JUST PATRICK, and others waiting for the back of the pack to join us. I went back to relay marks to the beer stop that had been washed away. JUST ED, JUST DAVE, and JUST LUIS soon joined us. SIR POOPS came in with his special lady SPECIAL ED GIVER. The first beer stop had been found and the second was nearby but the pack had to use the el to find it.
The pack ran to the Western brown line stop and took the el to Fullerton where we ran 20 yards to old party central for the second beer stop. LIFA and I stopped at Dominick’s for needed provisions, TOLIET PAPER for the old party central. We also got the hash some chips and pretzels, which went over well. We finished off most of the beer and ran back to the roof deck.
ITS TOO SOFT used the keg winch to get the beer up and the hash was enjoying the familiar flavor of GOLD and COLD. The hash circled up and punished the FRB CHICKEN STIFFER and we also punished MAGENTIC MUFF for excessive whining. SEX LUTHOR and JUST STEPHANE showed up saying they saw the flag on trail and followed it to FUJI’s place so the got punished for being NRB’s. JUST JENN and JUST PATRICK need to keep their racing attire at home so they got a down-down as well.
WE finally brought in our virgins in the circle, JUST ED, JUST MARK, JUST SCOTT, and JUST KRISTEN, theygot their demo down � down before they were initiated to our happy hash. The POP ladies of JUST LAUREN, SALTED GASH, PACKhER ARSE, and LIKES IT ON DA BOTTOM announced their hash on OCT. 13 in the Lincoln Park Area. The circle was closed and the food was served. Afterwards we did finally come up with a name for JUST CHRIS who will be known as “OPEN WIDE”. The party lasted late into the evening with a free screening of Old School being played for the hashers that were left. See you all next week for JUST LAURENS trail.
CHICKEN STIFFER
CH3-GM