Anthrax 2019 – Rego now!

Anthrax 2019 will take place on the weekend of Dec. 13-15.

The 17th Anal Anthrax is approaching. Main event details will be updated here.

The line of ‘Make Anthrax Great Again,’ the phrase, that was mine, I came up with it about a year ago, and I kept using it, and everybody’s using it, they are all loving it. I don’t know, I guess I should copyright it, maybe I have copyrighted it.

There will be trails. These will be, the best trails you’ve ever run, or that anyone has ever run. There will be a ballbuster–the longest ballbuster, an eagle–the most eagle there has been, a turkey–very turkey, so turkey in fact, I’m telling you, and even a walkers trail. I heard there will be walkers. I’m just saying we’re probably going to have walkers. Walkers are “hashers”, just not the best.

Your rego gets you these incredible trails and a fabulous taco buffet. I have a great relationship with tacos and I love Hispanics! There is also an open bar because there will be incredible, out of control, big league hashers that love beer. There will also be some very, very special beer, and frankly, you’re incredibly lucky to have this beer. It was very, very easy for me to get this beer, but I’m telling you, you’re very, very lucky. You’ll also get some fantastic gimmies. Great gimmies. A deadline will be posted when there is a cutoff for personalized gimmies. The pathetic, rude latecomers will not get top gimmies, and those hashers are weak, really.

Registration is open! We will have extraordinary security–the top security, honestly this security is tremendous–to prevent the crooked QCH3 hashers from taking up the staggering amount of phenomenal Chicago hashers ability to rego at the best rate. After I make Chicago First, the rest of the boring kennels can rego.

Rego here!

Who’s Cumming to Anthrax 2019

Regos availability as of 10/20:

$120 – 26 regos available
$130 – 25 regos available

Where should I stay? Info will be provided here soon.


What are the event details? Here is the schedule as of today. Expect a few tweaks as the event approaches.

$$$ = Included in your weekend rego price.

Thursday Dec. 12th
7:00 PM – Run with the Thirstday HHH at TBD venue, hared by Hooch Before Cooch & Silent But deadly $10

Friday Dec. 13th
6:00 AM – Day drinking on your own at any of the many watering holes in Chicago.

7:00 PM – Anthrax Prelube Trail (runners), hared by Lifa, Glory Hole & friends. A-to-A trail at Redmond’s Ale House – 3358 N. Sheffield Ave. $$$ or $10 walk-up.

8:00 PM to 11:59 PM – Drink hash beer at Redmond’s $$$ or upgrade to a drink package for $20

11:59 PM to Dawn – Continue drinking on your own.

Saturday Dec. 14th
11:00 AM – Check-in and pick up your goodies at Cactus Bar & Grill (404 S. Wells St.) The nearest L stations are Quincy & Wells and LaSalle & Van Buren (brown/orange/pink lines) and LaSalle (blue line). $$$

Noon – On out for Ball Busters

12:30 – On out for other trails

☞ Ball Buster (9+ miles*), hared by I Eat Dick and Pony Pound Her

☞ Eagle Trail (6~9 miles*), hared by Sandy Syphilis and ILLEGAL Gay Dancer

☞ Turkey Trail (4~6 miles*), hared by Silent But Deadly and Hooch Before Cooch

☞ Walkers Trail (3 miles*), hared by Snatchsquatch

* Distances are approximate “true trail” miles

4:00 PM – Back to the venue for a post-trail beer or 10. $$$

4:00 PM – Circle Up! $$$

5:30 PM – Dinner is served! Devour some tasty tacos from our taco bar. Vegetarian, and (likely) gluten-free options will be available. $$$

6:30 to 10:00 PM – Party and drink the night away $$$

10:01 PM – Wander to any number of drinking venues in area and continue drinking on your own.

Sunday Dec. 15th
10:00 AM – Wake up and grab brunch and a bloody Mary on your own.

Noon – Manthrax Hangover Run (runners, walkers) hared by Rusty Grundel & Dr. Cockvorkian.  A-to-A at Roscoe’s – 3356 N. Halsted St. $$$ or $10 walk-up.

2:00 PM – Circle Up! $$$

3:30 PM – Lunch is served. $$$

6:00 PM – Swing Low and GTFO until Anthrax 2020!