Category: Anthrax

2015 is almost in the books and that can mean only one thing – time to get your butt to Chicago for The Great Chicago Anthrax Scare & Santa Hat Run before your relatives lull to sleep during the holidays with boring stories.

Once again, no street, alley, or public park in the Windy City is safe as we celebrate how a few stray dollops of flour can shut down an entire neighborhood with food, fun, and, most importantly, beer.

Your rego guarantees you the aforementioned food, fun, and beer, as well as a hazmat suit, commemorative tag, and super-exclusive giveaway (you’re expected to provide your own santa hat, you Big Hump bastards). Who knows, we may go crazy and even have a shirt that can be purchased for an additional cost.

IMPORTANT TRAIL INFORMATION

Since it looks like Gispert is going to smile down upon us once again this year with good weather, the Hares have informed me that they will be setting not one, not two, but FOUR different trails for your Anthraxening pleasure. You must choose, but choose wisely –

“Gotta Lose that Muffin Top” BALLBUSTER ~10 miles
“I Believe I Can Fly” EAGLE ~ 7 miles
“At Least I Tried” TURKEY ~ 5 miles
“Give Me Booze Already” WALKERS ~3.5 miles

Each trail cums with at least three different drink stops plus the usual shenanigans that you’ve cum to expect from Anthrax.

Chicago HHH Run #1946
Sunday 12/21 – 12:00 PM
Hares: Snatchsquatch & Half Fag
Venue: Lincoln Square Lanes – 4874 N. Lincoln Ave

Hash Cash: $8
From da GM: We’re letting Snatchsquatch and Half Fag hare the Anthrax 2014 Hangover Trail – party like its 2011!
Environmentally-Friendly Public Transit 🙂

From Lincoln Park/Lakeview: Take the Brown Line north to Western. Go downstairs and hoof it north on Lincoln Ave and then go upstairs to the bowling alley.

From Wicker Park/Bucktown: Grab the 49 Western bus north to Ainslie. Exit the bus and hoof it up Lincoln and go upstairs to the bowling alley.

Driving 🙁

Hop in your hooptie and cruise to Lincoln and Ainslie. Park in the McDonald’s parking lot and get a thousand cheeseburgers you fattie fattie no friends.

Chicago HHH Run #1945
Saturday 12/20 – 12:00 PM
Hares: Glory Hole, Dr. Cockvorkian, & Mystery Co-Hares
Venue: Country Club (formerly Rebel) – 3462 N. Clark

Hash Cash: $60
From da GM: Anthrax 2014 Main Event
Environmentally-Friendly Public Transit 🙂

From Lincoln Park/Lakeview: Grab the Red Line north to Addison. Hoof it south down Sheffield, then back north on Clark to the bar.

From Wicker Park/Bucktown: Grab the 72 North Ave bus going east. Transfer to the Red Line at Clybourn. Take the Red Line north to Addison. Hoof it south down Sheffield, then back north on Clark to the bar.

Driving 🙁

Hop in your hooptie and cruise to Sheffield and Clark – plan on paying out the ass to leave your car overnight because this is Anthrax, motherfucker!

Chicago HHH Run #1944 Friday 12/19 – 7:00 PM @ O’Malley’s West

December 15, 2014 7:19 am / SnatchSquatch / Featured
Chicago HHH Run #1944
Friday 12/19 – 7:00 PM
Hares: Lifa and Furry Spice
Venue: O’Malley’s West – 2249 N Lincoln Ave

Hash Cash: $25
From da GM: Anthrax 2014 Pre-Lube Trail – we’ll have the upstairs to ourselves all night! Beer will be flowing, food will be provided, you’ll probably black out!
Environmentally-Friendly Public Transit 🙂

From Lincoln Park/Lakeview: Take the Red Line down to Fullerton, then hoof it east on Fullerton. Hoof it another couple blocks south on Lincoln to the bar.

From Wicker Park/Bucktown: Grab the 72 North Ave bus going east. Exit the train at Fullerton, then hoof it east on Fullerton. Hoof it another couple blocks south on Lincoln to the bar.

Driving 🙁

Hop in your hooptie and cruise to Lincoln & Belden. Be prepared to pay for parking until 10PM and then have to come and pick up your car the next morning.

Anthrax 2014
Friday, December 19 – Sunday, December 21, 2014

| Online Registration | Printable Registration | Who’s Cumming |

You’re cute Ebola, but the “mysterious white powder” that is anthrax has been causing public scares for over a decade now.

Join us once again at The Great Chicago Anthrax Scare & Santa Hat Run as we celebrate how a few stray dollops of flour can shut down an entire neighborhood. This year’s weekend of debauchery finds us once again hashing through the streets, alleys, and public parks of the Windy City.

Don’t forget to rego early – not only will you save yourself some cash, but this year space is limited. There’s only room for 100 of us this year, so we will be forced to turn people away at the door if we exceed that number. Rego today to guarantee your spot!

SCHEDULE OF EVENTS &
WALK-UP PRICE:
Fri, Dec 19th – 7PM –
Chicago H3 #1944
Anthrax Pre-Lube Trail – $25

Sat, Dec 20th – NOON –
Chicago H3 #1945
Anthrax Main Event – $60

Sun, Dec 21st – NOON –
Chicago H3 #1946
Anthrax Hangover Trail – $8

TOTAL WALK-UP PRICE – $93

CURRENT PRICE:
Main Event Registration: $50
Weekend Registration: $75

Chicago HHH Run #1883
Anthrax 2013 Hangover
Sunday 12/15 – 12:00 PM
Hares: Mystery Hares
Venue: Lincoln Square Lanes – 4874 N. Lincoln Ave
Hash Cash: $5

From da GM: We’re starting early so that we have plenty of time to drink our hangovers from the weekend away.

Environmentally-Friendly Public Transit 🙂
From Lincoln Park/Lakeview: Grab the Brown Line to Western – hoof it north up Western and then north up Lincoln.

From Wicker Park/Bucktown: Grab the 49 Western bus north to Argyle, hoof it north on Lincoln.

Driving 🙁
Hop in your hooptie and cruise to Lincoln and Western.

Chicago HHH Run #1882
Anthrax 2013 Main Event
Saturday 12/14 – 12:00 PM
Hares: Fistful of Pricks, EpiPenis, & Bi-Hole Her
Venue: A.J. Hudson’s – 3801 N. Ashland Ave
Hash Cash: $60

From da GM: Bar is “pay-as-you-go” until Chalk Talk at 1PM. We have food, fun, and giveaways, so don’t miss out.

Environmentally-Friendly Public Transit 🙂
From Lincoln Park/Lakeview: Take the Brown Line to Addison. Hoof it east on Addison and then north on Ashland.

From Wicker Park/Bucktown: Grab the 9 Ashland bus north to Grace.

Driving 🙁
Hop in your hooptie and cruise to Grace and Ashland – good luck finding parking, but let’s be honest you shouldn’t be driving after this disaster.

Chicago HHH Run #1881
Anthrax 2013 Pre-Lube
Friday 12/13 – 7:00 PM
Hares: Lifa & Bert’s Special Friend
Venue: O’Malley’s West – 2249 N. Lincoln Ave
Hash Cash: $25

From da Hares: You have the option of running a trail with multiple beer stops or plopping your butt on a bar stool and getting a head start on drinking. There will be a place to store your bags at O’Malley’s West.

From da GM: We have a private room upstairs starting at 9PM and we’ll have plenty of beer flowing and food for people to enjoy. If you’re not running, you’re on your own for drinks until the room opens.

Environmentally-Friendly Public Transit 🙂
From Lincoln Park/Lakeview: Hoof it to the bar.

From Wicker Park/Bucktown: Grab the 72 North Ave bus heading east. Transfer to the 8 Halsted bus going north and ride that sucker up to Belden. Hoof it east to Lincoln and then south to the bar.

Driving 🙁
Hop in your hooptie and cruise to Lincoln and Belden – have fun paying for parking until 10PM because some idiots in city hall thought we could get the 2016 Olympics.

Chicago HHH Run #1821

Anthrax 2012 Hangover

Sunday 12/16 – 11:00 AM

Hares: That Thing That Vibrates & Glitter Spitter

Venue: 31st Beach – Approx. 31st St & Moe Dr.

View Larger Map

Hash Cash: $5

From da Hares: We’ll be starting extra early for this one, as the hash will be meeting up with the boys from Tailgate 32 before starting out hangover trail. This will be A to B with transportation for whatever you need to the end.

From da GM: For those who are too hungover from the main event or just too lazy to walk more than five minutes from an El stop to hash, the on-after will be Four Treys (3333 N. Damen) and you’re more than welcome to join us there once we’re done. And no, we won’t be running straight to Four Treys from the tailgate, we’ll be running to an undisclosed El stop, at which point we’ll all take the CTA to the on-after.

Environmentally-Friendly Public Transit 🙂
From Lincoln Park/Lakeview: Red Line to Roosevelt. Hoof it east over to Michigan Ave and hop on the 3 King Drive Bus heading south. Ride that pony down to 31st St. Hoof it east to Moe Drive. Head north just a touch and you’ll find the entrance to the tailgate parking lot. Look for the Tailgate 32 RV for the start of trail.
From Wicker Park/Bucktown: Blue Line to Jackson. Transfer to the Red Line and then head south to Roosevelt. Hoof it east over to Michigan Ave and hop on the 3 King Drive Bus heading south. Ride that pony down to 31st St. Hoof it east to Moe Drive. Head north just a touch and you’ll find the entrance to the tailgate parking lot. Look for the Tailgate 32 RV for the start of trail.
Driving 🙁
Hop in your hooptie and cruise to 31st and Moe Drive. Pay out the ass for Bears tailgating parking.

Chicago HHH Run #1820
Anthrax 2012
Saturday 12/15 – 1:00 PM
Hares: R Tard E, WJew-40 & Rusty Grundle
Venue: O’Neil’s On Wells – 411 S. Wells St
Hash Cash: $65

From da GM: This is it, the main event. We’ll have an especially shitty trail through the heart of downtown Chicago, awesome food, a t-shirt, tag, and hazmat suit, and the bar all to ourselves for this event.

Environmentally-Friendly Public Transit
From Lincoln Park/Lakeview: Brown Line to Quincy/Wells. Head downstairs and hoof it South on Wells to the bar.
From Wicker Park/Bucktown: Blue Line to LaSalle. Head upstairs and hoof it West on Congress to Wells and then North to the bar.

Driving
Hop in your hooptie and cruise to Wells and Congress. There might be parking, but let’s be honest, you’re not driving to this one.