NOTES: For this song there is a leader, a female participant, and the rest of the crowd. The leader names one body part on the female participant, which is repeated back by the rest of the crowd (for certain body parts there is an optional different response indicated by parenthesis). After every singing of the chorus, the leader adds another body part (which is repeated back) and then repeats all previously mentioned body parts (which are also repeated back). Once all of the body parts have been mentioned, the leader tell the female participant that she is a “real good sport,” the chorus is sung, and the song concludes.

ACTIONS: An unsuspecting female participant (often a virgin who is then scared away and never returns again) is needed for this song. When one is selected, she is asked to stand on a chair or another high object. When a feature is highlighted, all those singing then point out that part on the participant.


Melody – Alouette

Alouette, gentille Alouette,
Alouette je te plumerai.

Leader: Does she have ze stringy hair?
All: Oui, she has ze stringy hair.
Leader: Stringy hair,
All: Stringy hair,
Leader: Alouette!
All: Alouette! Aah, aah, aah, aah . . . (chorus)

Leader: Does she have ze furrowed brow?
All: Oui, she has ze furrowed brow,
Leader: Furrowed brow,
All: Furrowed brow,
Leader: Stringy hair,
All: Stringy hair,
Leader: Alouette! Aah, aah, aah, ahh . . . (chorus)

  • Wooden eye (Yes I would!) . . .
  • Broken nose . . .
  • Blow job lips . . .
  • Two buck teeth . . .
  • Double chin . . .
  • Swinging tits . . . (GREAT BIG, SWINGING TITS!)
  • Beer belly . . .
  • Furry thing . . .
  • Thunder Thighs . . .
  • Knobby Knees . . .
  • Ingrown Toes . . .

Leader: Now isn’t she a real-good-sport?
All: Oui, she is a real-good-sport,
Leader: Real-good-sport,
All: Real-good-sport,
Leader: Alouette! Aah, aah, aah . . . (chorus)