Tale of the Trail – Chicago Hash #1493 @ Case de Puke and Single Wide
Hares: Puke Suit Riot, Single Wide Mobile Ho
VIRGINS: Just Chris, Just Bess
HASHERS: Magnetic Muff, Just Lauren, Horn-e, Chicken Stiffer, Mr. Cheesecake, My Little Pony, Canned Pussy, Mount Schwinga, Milk My Yak, Barks on All Fours, Its too Soft, Smell This, Lower Whackoff
VISITORS: Happy Meal-GM BVDH3 Melbourne Florida
Virgins=2
Hares= 2
Total Hashers= 18
The Chicago Hash after having a successful May seeing 30+ hashers at each hash got nailed by hashers whining, “I’m not coming to the hash because its raining”. You people missed a great trail, circle and cookout, and guess what it never rained after 6:30 pm. PUKE SUIT RIOT, the hare, was smart and laid the trail live which gave us easy marks to follow because it didn’t RAIN!!! I met our visiting GM, HAPPY MEAL, who flew in from Florida to hash with us early. We had a few beers before we ran trail, Blue Moons for $3 nice!!! SINGLE WIDE MOBILE HO gave us a chalk talk for the virgins benefit and then we were off going north. Many of the virgins were heard saying just FOLLOW THE HASH FLAG!! We traveled North with MR. CHEESECAKE and HORN-E leading the pack on. The trail went in a NE direction and our hash virgin, JUST CHRIS was getting the hang of finding trail and began checking after splits and checks nice job!!!! The trail angled back to the east and passed by Wrigley Field home of the mighty, mighty CUBS!!! It is here where HORN-E and I got lost after a check. I found trail again and caught up to CP, JUST LAUREN, and HAPPY MEAL by the Addison red line stop but HORN-E wasn’t seen until the on–in go figure?? I hooked up with the three ladies and we worked together finding trail back through the Lakeview neighborhood to the home of PUKE SUIT and SWMH!!
The ON-IN was the backyard of PUKE SUIT who took it upon himself to put up a tent in case it would have rained. The pack made it back here with little or no trouble. JUST BESS and MY LITTLE PONY in from MH3 said they had a blast but the fun had not even begun yet!!! They were plenty of snacks and beer for the ravenous hashers to replenish their fluids and energy provided by the hares. The circle was convened and Mr. CHEESE CAKE was the FRB. During the Circle HORN-E was seen climbing over the back fence even though the trail came through the front yard so he was named the DFL. JUST LAUREN drank a down-down for the missing JUST KELLY who bugged out because it was raining?!!?? ! Our visitor, HAPPY MEAL gave the hash a nice big flash. To bad LOWER WHACKOFF missed it because he was on the wrong side of the circle. MILK MY YAK got his down-down for being a non-running wienie. The circle progressed and I turned around and there was SMELL THIS in business attire, and finally or hash flash showed up, ITS TOO SOFT. The circle was soon closed and we ate PUKE SUITS hot dogs that he was kind enough to grill!!! MAGNETIC MUFF is haring a moon hash in a week and MOUNT SCHWINGA will be haring her first hash on JUNE 25 so support her in a few weeks. Remember also 1500th hash on JULY 21st is fast approaching so pay up you wankers!
CHICKEN STIFFER
CH3-GM